Oliver…plus why did God makes Moms?

Oliver is home, is fine and dosen’t even seem to know he no longer has testicles 🙂 I guess I had nothing to worry about after all.
In October 2007 I posted this, I came across it while going through my memories and I love it so much I have to post it again.
I can’t even begin to tell you how much I just love children, I used to watch Kids Say the Darnest Things all the time..
Anyhow here we go,
WHY GOD MADE MOMS

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1. She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He
just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything
nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men’s bones. Then they mostly
use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
1. We’re related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people’s moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don’t know because I wasn’t there, but my guess would be
pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he
get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and
YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that Mom didn’t have her thinking cap on. (I love
this one!)

Who’s the boss at your house?
1. Mom doesn’t want to be boss, but she has to because dad’s such a
goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the
bed.
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What’s the difference between moms & dads?
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power cause
that’s who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend’s.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.

What does your mom do in her spare time?
1. Mothers don’t do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?
1. On the inside, she’s already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of
plastic surgery.
2. Dye it. You know, her hair. I’d dye it, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I’d get
rid of that.
2. I’d make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister
who did it and not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back
of her head.

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About mommamaynard

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.” — Albert Einstein. When it feels like your world has been shattered, and you have reached rock bottom, you must make a choice: Stay where you are and fade away, or keep moving forward. Thankfully I chose to move forward and was blessed with the two most wonderful children after the death of my first in early labor. Things are looking up.

Posted on December 5, 2008, in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. Haha! My favourites:
    Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and
    YES to chores?

    and
    Mothers don’t do spare time.

    • I don’t know what my favorites are..I just love them all. I am so obessesed with little children’s minds and way of thinking. I took all the infant and child phsychology course I could in University, it just enthralls me.
      I love these ones
      “God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean”
      “Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.”

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