Two nightmares two nights in a row. I am zonked from crappy sleep with crappy dreams. It’s also been very very grey here since last Saturday and this entire combination is causing some hefty depressing moods. Yoy!

Things are just not going well with Dave in terms of things working out financially, things just keep collapsing instead. It’s so sad, I wish just one of 1000000 things he has tried would work out for him. He pays balance protection insurance on his credit card to protect himself in times like this, has for years, after it’s all said and done they want to give him $25.00 a month-his minimum payment is $80 WTF? He has been waiting 48 hours to hear back from a manager to explain how that is. He has two jobs he was working on when he got injured, he can finish 80% by himself but need’s help for cuts on the table saw and some lifting, he has a friend who said he would help, Dave will pay him for his time, he has cancelled 2x already, it’s 2 measly days. When he called last night to say he can’t do it at all this month, I fell to the ground and cried. If he can get these job’s done he will get $500 after having paid his helper. That is more then he is making a month right now on workers compensation. If we were anywere near family, or our many many Toronto friends, we wouldn’t feel so helpless and alone. We are new here and have only a handful of friends, none of them carpenters. Dave has two more surgeries before his hand is fully healed. We are debating meeting with a bankrupcy trusty to see how he could do that without it impacting me, cause I have great credit and the house is in my name, but really just want that to be a last resort. Why does it seem like everyone kicks you when your down? 

Mom comes tonight for the weekend-I hope we have fun. I need a good weekend. Ok last weekend was really good to, I admit it. 🙂
In these times of heavy depression I have to tell myself-I have an amazing husband and a great partnership, that is something many people don’t have and I know I am blessed. I own my own home, it’s so cute and totally affordable under normal circumstance, less then renting. I have the sweetest Dog who loves me so much and makes me smile every single day. I am healthy and relatively fit. I have a really good life compared to many many people. Things will get better, I just have to hold on long enough to get there. I am lucky and blessed, just having a rough run of things lately.

Repeat as ofter as needed. 🙂

About mommamaynard

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.” — Albert Einstein. When it feels like your world has been shattered, and you have reached rock bottom, you must make a choice: Stay where you are and fade away, or keep moving forward. Thankfully I chose to move forward and was blessed with the two most wonderful children after the death of my first in early labor. Things are looking up.

Posted on February 13, 2009, in Uncategorized and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. What the fuck! Our CC protection covers ALL PAYMENTS for up to a freaking YEAR! And it costs like $1 for every $100 on your balance, so basically, nothing! I’d be so pissed, J, I don’t know how you’re holding it together and mowing those fuckers down!!!
    You deserve a fabulous weekend with your mom. I hope you eat lots of delicious food, drink yummy wine, and romp around with Oliver a lot. I hope, most of all, you’re able to relax and enjoy yourself. This WILL get better, just because it has to.
    ❤ ❤ ❤

    • Hey! Were to begin.
      We have the same CC insurance as you, it’s an american company. Read the small print and ask questions, they told him that regulations had changed and they only covered the minimum amount needed to keep his account in good standing, they claim this is $25…he asked to speak to a manager for clarification, 3 days later, we still have not heard a damn thing. We also pay 1$ per 100 basically, he has a 5k balance, he pays 50$ a month.
      Second-I don’t know if my mom will come now..grrrr. we will see, waiting on my brother. He is an unreliable ass that made her miss her bus here. I will blog about it in more detail but basically after getting her to the bus late he said he would drive her the 3 hours each way, but is now MIA.

  2. thats bullshit about his credit card. paymeny protection is supposed to pay your minimum, not a small amount that doesnt help at all.
    i hope things turn around for you two soon. you need a break.

  3. I remember when I was so down and in the dumps several years ago because of finances. It seemed like the weight of the world was on my shoulders. (I ended up having to claim bankruptcy and it ended up being a good thing afterall…) I was on the phone with my dad (a man of very few words) and he listened to my sobbing on the phone about my financial crises for about 15 min or so and then he said the most cliche thing I’d ever heard “you still have your health” he said. And I really thought about what he said. It really sunk in for some reason. All that other stuff just really didn’t matter anymore. As long as you and Dave are here on this earth together and he is finally healed–that’s all that really does matter. ((hugs))

  4. It’s amazing that through all this shit you have gone through and continue to go through, you keep this positive outlook at the end of it all. You have an amazing strength that I envy.

    • Thanks.
      Your the best. I wish you were closer to tell me this in person all the time haha it’s good for my self esteem. I need friends like you near me these hard times.

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