Big step for me…so proud

Today is the first time I drove alone with Evangeline in the car. I was petrified, cause I am still a relatively new-ish driver and I was paranoid.
Dave is having his what? 5th ish surgery today, so we had to drop him off at the hospital this morning and come back home. Evangeline was an angel and slept the whole time. Then I was feeling brave, and bored, so I decided the two of us would head out again to the new parents group at the family center. So we did, and Evangeline cried the whole way there but was really good once we arrived and then slept the whole way home.

I feel so good that I finally conquered that fear. I knew it was inevitable, but Dave was always home to drive us before today.

I was meant to go there today, there was a new mom with a 7 month old, she told me she had a stillbirth at 25ish weeks 3 years ago, and it took her over two years to have the courage to try again. I told them about Evan, cried a little. but it was nice to share. Now they know how truly special Evangeline is. Turns out the director of the group lost a baby at 15 weeks herself. Man us loss mama’s are all around, you just never know what the person sitting beside you has been through.

Also-she finally pooped today, after 4 entire poop free days. It was just a normal poop in size and consistency. Were the hell is all the milk going? She eats alot every day, so I expected alot more poo, unless it’s still to come..

Ah well, back to the grind..I don’t even know what the grind is anymore, I guess it’s folding diapers today.

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About mommamaynard

ā€œLife is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.ā€ ā€” Albert Einstein. When it feels like your world has been shattered, and you have reached rock bottom, you must make a choice: Stay where you are and fade away, or keep moving forward. Thankfully I chose to move forward and was blessed with the two most wonderful children after the death of my first in early labor. Things are looking up.

Posted on March 30, 2010, in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. 18 Comments.

  1. Oh and yay for the pooping! Sofia was the SAME WAY – totally normal-sized poops even after a couple days! Watch out for subsequent ones, though. Sofia made up in numbers of poops what she lacked in size of them šŸ˜›

  2. Oh and yay for the pooping! Sofia was the SAME WAY – totally normal-sized poops even after a couple days! Watch out for subsequent ones, though. Sofia made up in numbers of poops what she lacked in size of them šŸ˜›

    • haha well we had two yesterday and none today….I guess she was just growing. She’s stocking up again I guess since she’s back to eating every 2 hours in the last 24. Dave’s mom pointed out something that I noticed to be true, babies get fatter and fatter cheeks whilst stocking up for a growth spurt, then bam overnight the cheeks are slimmer and baby is bigger, it’s certainly true for E. and her cheeks are deliciously pudgy today.

    • haha well we had two yesterday and none today….I guess she was just growing. She’s stocking up again I guess since she’s back to eating every 2 hours in the last 24. Dave’s mom pointed out something that I noticed to be true, babies get fatter and fatter cheeks whilst stocking up for a growth spurt, then bam overnight the cheeks are slimmer and baby is bigger, it’s certainly true for E. and her cheeks are deliciously pudgy today.

  3. Great job, mama! I remember how terrified you were when just YOU started learning to drive after Evan died. You’ve come a long way in so many ways šŸ˜€

    It’s weirdly sickening and comforting to find other loss mamas šŸ˜¦ but it’s always nice to be able to speak our babies’ names, eh?

  4. Great job, mama! I remember how terrified you were when just YOU started learning to drive after Evan died. You’ve come a long way in so many ways šŸ˜€
    It’s weirdly sickening and comforting to find other loss mamas šŸ˜¦ but it’s always nice to be able to speak our babies’ names, eh?

    • Thanks, I was thinking the same thing..I have changed so much on so many levels (some good some bad) in 2 years since loosing my Evan šŸ˜¦ God I miss that boy..when I think about it, I don’t how I survived, or got here, thank god for numbness as a protection…oy.
      I hate not talking about him, I hate saying she’s my first child when people ask, I hate that I lie out of fear of alienating people…

    • Thanks, I was thinking the same thing..I have changed so much on so many levels (some good some bad) in 2 years since loosing my Evan šŸ˜¦ God I miss that boy..when I think about it, I don’t how I survived, or got here, thank god for numbness as a protection…oy.
      I hate not talking about him, I hate saying she’s my first child when people ask, I hate that I lie out of fear of alienating people…

  5. shes a growing girl. poop is waste, dude.

  6. shes a growing girl. poop is waste, dude.

  7. I’m glad to hear you’ve venturd out into unchartered territory! Good for you! It sounds like it was def meant to be that you got out to meet some new mom friends. Very cool.

    I think that might have just been the beginning btw with the poop…

  8. I’m glad to hear you’ve venturd out into unchartered territory! Good for you! It sounds like it was def meant to be that you got out to meet some new mom friends. Very cool.
    I think that might have just been the beginning btw with the poop…

  9. Big step for me…so proud

    your milk is sooo good for her, she is just absorbing all the nutrients. Poop is just the waste she didnt use:) and yay for driving! Hope daves surgery goes well

  10. Big step for me…so proud
    your milk is sooo good for her, she is just absorbing all the nutrients. Poop is just the waste she didnt use:) and yay for driving! Hope daves surgery goes well

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